I’ve been back for a couple weeks now, my feet have healed (mostly), and I’ve been thinking that I should sum up this experience. Overall, it’s been really positive, and I’m glad I did it. It’s been a challenging couple months for me, and this trip helped me clear my head and decide what’s important. Before I left I’d been struggling with what’s next. The layoff shook my confidence more than I was willing to admit to myself and others. My wife and I have been struggling for a few years now and had decided to separate. Had the housing market been better here we probably would have been a lot farther down that path. It’s the classic story: we drifted apart over the years while we raised the kids, chasing career goals and other things that aren’t as important as they seem in the moment.

I’ve always liked my alone time, and had even convinced myself that I prefer to be alone. Let me tell you, I had a lot of alone time over the course of this trip and it got pretty lonely out there. Evenings in the lean-to were the toughest, and found myself missing my wife most. Through our discussions about separating, I didn’t really fight it, finding it easier to just let it happen instead of trying (and potentially failing) to make things work between us.

I really didn’t know why I had to make this hike, but I felt like there was no other option. I think that’s why I felt like such a failure when I couldn’t go on. I understand now that I needed this trip to help me realize that the real failure is in not trying at all. I hurried from the mountains to tell my wife that she, and our relationship are worth the effort, and that I was willing make that effort. We didn’t get to the brink of separation overnight, so it’s not going to be fixed overnight, either. We’re taking it one day at a time, and I’m excited to see how this new relationship evolves. It could go in some interesting directions, as neither of us is interested in an Ozzie and Harriet deal.

This realization makes it easier to focus on the job search, and I’ve got a few good leads. Given the state of the economy, I’m cautiously optimistic. I’m also tweaking a hot sauce recipe that I think could be big :) . So overall, the trip was very positive, although I never would have predicted that things would have turned out this way. Thanks for all the kind comments.